fishy suicide

Yep, I guess life just got to be too much for him. He was there eating at breakfast, by dinner, he was gone. I searched all the normal places for him. I even uprooted one of the plants to see if he got stuck somehow. No luck. The Boy eventually found him laying in a little brittle mass on the carpet about 2 feet from the tank. His eyes were all sunken in, his body was dried out and hard and his beautiful fins broke off when we scraped him off of the carpet. I have to wonder what made him to it.

For those of you who somehow missed it, I am talking about one of my fish. My male betta decided to take a great leap into the unknown yesterday. I don't think he found heaven, not unless fish heaven is a lint covered carpet.

on growing up

Everyones seen it. The young child who should know better but is still doing it cause it gets results. Standing at the checkout lane screaming his head off for that candybar while his mortified parents try to shush him. That kid? Not a responsible adult. Not even a responsible child. To him, the world revolves around making him happy. He wants the candy, he should get the candy and he's going to bellow out his outrage to the world if he doesn't get it. How dare the world not get in line and give itself to him.

hmmmm...

Eventaully, someone will break it to him that the world doesn't owe him shit. If he wants something, he's gotta put in the effort to get it. Get a job or get some petty thief skills. If his parent's are lucky, that message will sink in before he's 30 years old and still living in their basement and having his mom do his laundry.

Sure, you can get by without ever having to lift a finger. You can live off the system for your entire lifetime. You can even stand there and scream your outrage to the entire world because the system doesn't give you everything you want. But don't complain to about these things to me. I choose a different path. I have no sympathy for you and I might very well clock you upside the head. You're a fucking adult, deal with it. Does that make me a Bad Person?

Sure, I could be on a street corner preaching peace instead of making baby killing war machines. I could sell all my earthly possessions and donate the money to a Good Cause. Would any of that make me more responsible? Not hardly, since it would break many of my prior committments and promises. If not responsible, would it at least make me a Good Person?

Depends on your definition.

A Good Person doesn't not necessarily equal a responsible adult. Nor are they necessarily distinct. You can be both, you can be neither, a lot of people I know are only one or the other. You choose, just like everyone else.

And that screaming child/adult? Well, like my mom used to say, if you want to cry, I'll give you a reason to. Maybe she had something there.